Knock Knock *opens the door*

Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

What did the judge say to the midget when he sent him to jail ? Stop beating your wife

What do you call 100 black people at the bottom of the ocean? An unfortunate tragedy and astonishingly ironic curcumstance.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a pineapple? There will be no funeral for the pineapple..

What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

why did the chicken cross the street? he couldn't, he lives in a rural area on a farm where there are no streets

The knocking didn’t cease. It grew harder as the voice grew louder. “Let me in! Let me in! LET ME IN!” The knocking grew so fierce it could have shattered the door. Tears leaked from her eyes. “What do I do,” she thought “should I open the door?” The knocking was more than she could bear. “I know you’re in there, Kat.” it said. Her stomach twisted, her breath caught in her throat, and tears now streamed down her face. “Go away!” she shouted finally. “Let me in!” it screamed in response. “Leave me alone!” she cried. The voice and the knocking echoed in her head, making her more nauseous than before. Reaching for the lock hesitantly, she sucked up her tears and held her breath, unlocking the door and throwing it open. Nothing was there. The tree stood in the yard unmoving, no wind. Nothing. She shut the door, shaking in fear. With the click of the lock, the room grew cold. Goose-bumps covered her skin. “Thank you for letting me in.” a voice whispered behind her.

What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Guess what! what haha u listened to me

You and your parents are going to die today

Why did Johnny lose the race he got jawed by a pack of chimpanzees

What's up brah brah

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

Q: whats better than having sex? A: nothing

A: We're eating you for breakfast today. B: Thank you, I'll have my arm.

What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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