There once was a man from Peru, who dreamed he swallowed his shoe. But it turns out his dream was real, and he died because he could not digest a whole shoe.

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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What's black,white, and red all over? Nothing, because if it is completely covered in red then it can only be red.

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Sticks and stones can break my bones And words can make me lonely

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Ask me if I'm a tree... Are you a tree? No.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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Q: Why is six afraid of seven? A: Why??? Q: Idk, thats why I asked

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Two gorillas walked into a bar and it hurt

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What is pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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Q: What's worse than dropping your phone in water? A: Throwing water at your phone.

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What did the duck wear to go swimming? A bathingsuit!

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocost

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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Why did the boy commit scuicide? Because he was mentaly scared due to constant tormenting and teasing from his friends

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Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he was dead

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A man throws a penny off of a cliff. He is now one cent poorer

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it hit a poll and died of brain damage the next day

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A black guy, a Jew, and a Mexican jump out of a plane. Who dies first? Well, judging by the fact that black people in general have a higher body mass, the black man most likely would smash into the ground first.

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Why didn't the cow go to the candy store It had diabetes poor cow :(

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops