Boy: "Mom, I don't want to walk in circles anymore." Mother: "Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."

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A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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Why is this funny? cause it is funny

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun

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What are vampires favorite drink? Vampires aren't real.

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There are two types of people in this world: Those who can finish lists. and

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knock knock. Who's there? The delivery man.

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A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

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Why didn't the Irishman want to drink anymore? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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why did the the chicken cross the road? because some sad,board people wanted to make a joke

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I have aids

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why did the girl cross the road? to commit suicide

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Conner Schmidt's fiance has the fattest ass in the world <3

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house..... It's ok he hasn't either.

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doctor , doctor , i feel depressed , we will start you on a course of anti-depressents , vitimins , and daily exercise, make a appointment for next week , and i will referrer you to a phycatrist

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Biggest lie ever; "I have read and agree to the terms of service".

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What did the normal guy say when he went to the Special Olympics? What a bunch of retards.

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How does the black, high school kid get his new clothes, IPod and nikes? By working at his family-owned convenient store with his father and grandfather every night after school, but not until his homework is done.

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Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

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Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

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What did the Homeless man get for Christmas? A dollar

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A penis takes a trip to spain, he falls in love with an apple and proceeds to commit suicide

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Joker2? Who comes up with the names anyways? Sounds like a stupid version of the matrix... Anyways, I stutter because my nerves are killing me, I cant quit the painkillers cold turkey if I cant sleep without them, besides I am used to physical pain as tragic as that might sound... Its not when you get used to it. I need to know who this Neo-Nero was, for anyone that can tell me, he is not around here at these hours, and during the time he/she I was dead, did considerable damage to my and my orders reputation, I need a face to face talk to someone that would put aside my chosen successor and assume my role, and I wont let that happen again even if it means bruising up this Neo-me a bit.

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Knock Knock. Whose there. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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