you are driving down the highway, if two birds make a bee then how many pies can fly at once? None because I can't read

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What did the Pornstar say to his wife? He concluded that a divorce was the way forward for both of them as, seeming as he was a pornstar, he was almost certainly having extra-maritial sexual intercourse, unhealthy for any working relationship.

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Why did Hitler kill himself? Cause he couldn't afford to pay the gas bill.

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What did the man say when he lost his keys? "Where's my keys?!"

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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Did you hear about the eskimo and the pregnant lady? The eskimo got the pregnant lady pregnant.

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ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS 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ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS ADVENTURE TIME ROCKS MAD SUCKS A

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Girl: Want to stay over at mine tonight? Guy: Yeah I'd love to! Girl: Tough, you can't

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How do you drop a raw egg on to the floor without cracking it? Any way you want, it is very hard to crack concrete.

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Why couldnt the boy poop? Because he was staring right in his eye.

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Q: What is, in full, Donald Trump's speech to the Republican National Convention? A: This. I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! Trump tromp troomp trimp treemp tramp trump trump trump!

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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yo' momma's so fat that when she saw a doctor he told her that she was overweight.

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what's silver and red and keeps crashing into the walls? a baby with forks in its eyes

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Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

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What's the difference between basketball and an elephant? One's a sport and one's a large African animal.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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Why did the dude fall? Because he tripped over a stick.

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How do you make friends with a squrriel? Trust me, don't.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their firstborn child.

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What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

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what smells worse then shit Drew White

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yuor momma so fat she has type 2 diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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