raisin boogers

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow Jones.

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What is the difference between a black man and a white man? The pigment in their skin.

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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Why did the black family cry? Tyler Perry died

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A Irishman walks into a bar... he suffers severe head injuries.

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What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

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What name does Steve Bartman go by Now? Steve Bartman, but he just hides all day trying not to be killed.

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bacon

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A drunk guy walks into a bar. A blind man walks into the same bar.

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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? I don't know... Does the deaf woman locked in my basement?

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Not at all Nero, if humanity itself where better, you would never have had that pain you rather than carry seems to be stuck to you, what you call your armor, sounds more like a cage to me, it is no wonder that you lose faith in those that drag you down while you find peace and hope within yourself by helping them. I believe you got every right to lose hope in humanity at times, in my eyes you have always been much greater than them, you just seem to believe that if you fail at helping others, then you have failed yourself, remember that there are too many people that surrender in this world, that do not want to be helped back on their own feet rather than to be "shown the only way", you said it yourself, monkey see, monkey do is easy, too easy, and you never take the easy way. I am sorry if I copy your methods too much, it might seem to others as if you are chatting with yourself, which is just crazy, insane. silly, lets just say again that you just got a admirer in me, it cant be helped. Does this bother you?

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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roses are red violets are blue you know what? im sick and tired of this joke.

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Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

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Why was the little boy screaming? He was going down a steep drop on a roller coaster.

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Where do black guys sit in the bus? Enywhere theres a free seat

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

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What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

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if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

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What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

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what do a plane and a mouse have in common? nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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