Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the road was clear of oncoming traffic.

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Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

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why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

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What did Helen Keller do when she found a dead body? Nothing.

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What do ghosts get whaen they watch porn ? a boner

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Do you want to hear a joke? No. Women's- oh, okay.

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What a gay guy get on his IQ test? 69

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Dad what does negligence mean? SHUT THE FUCK UP KID! I TOLD YOU TO NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN!

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whats black and white and red all over????? a zebra who got shot

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How do you get an Asian man to build you a computer? Pay him a reasonable amount of money

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Your mom's so fat that she went in to get liposuction and subsequently died from infection.

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How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

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matt f stupid because no one likes him

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What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

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Why did the Mexican choose the blue marker over the green one? Because he his favorite color was green, and it was Opposite Day.

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Why do fancy unicorns wear jackets? Because they're fancy.

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why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

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What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

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What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Pirate math.

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Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

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What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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how do you make a mailman mad? you sleep with his wife

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what did the dirty homeless girl get for Christmas -A DILDO

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops