3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

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guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

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(insert antijoke here

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Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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a blind man walks into a bar it hurt.

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Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

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Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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Why didn't the dog like baseball? Being a dog, it had no idea or interest in what baseball is.

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hi hi strager danger

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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What?

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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An Asian, Burnett, and a Blond are stranded on an island. They all say, "What the crap?! How'd I get on this island?!"

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My mom told me about a funnel they make for women now that they can use to pee standing up. I told her it was a ploy to promote feminism.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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