There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

thumb_up thumb_down -108

Q: What do you call a car full of black people? A: Stolen

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +17

the Holocaust. Because anything involving the Holocaust is automatically an anti joke. the Holocaust wasn't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -9

An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Yo momma is SO black.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Two girls are sitting quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

I'm so hungry I could eat food

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops