finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Whoevers at the door you should probably go answer it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

Once upon a time, your face.

What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

your mammas so fat she has to buy pants in the xxlarge section of the store

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

What's older than history? Pre-history.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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