A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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The economy.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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what did max say to shelby? I hate black people.

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Four guys are on an airplane. The plane lands safely and the four guys return to their families.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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