How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the chicken cross the road? because potatos are invading russia

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I have a knock knock joke. You start.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why do u call a book a book??? Cause it is a book!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

you know what they say... hydrate or die

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Steve Jobs didn't die. He went to go set up iCLOUD.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops