A baby seal walks into a club.

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Obama being reelected.

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A man wearing dark sunglasses walks into a convenience store with a dog on a leash. He goes to the middle of the store, and he starts swinging the dog around over his head by the leash. The store clerk comes over and asks, "what are you doing?" The man replies, "Ajiohskdcojqpowuskncvlkzb" Not knowing what else to do, the clerk calls 911. It turns out the man's name is Ruprict, and he has escaped from the local mental institution. A police officer shortly arrives to bring Ruprict back to the hospital.

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Chuck Norris is dead......

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

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why was the little boy crying? he wasnt, he died 2 weeks ago

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Whats the difference between cake and dead babies? Cakes make people happy while dead babies are a sad and disturbing sight to see.

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What did the kid with cancer get for christmas? Hope.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

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How did Jimmy get hit by the car? He dropped his Ice cream cone.

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What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

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Why was 6 afraid of 12? Because 12 used to beat up 6 and now 6 has a restraining order against 12. 12 has to stay at least 5 numbers away from 6.

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Replacement Referees

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Hey! Do you like fishsticks? Me too :)

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I like my coffee how I like my women Without a penis

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whats black and doesnt work? a broken black toaster

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? 17

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Did you know that if you say "gullible" slowy, it still sounds like you're saying "gullible."

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Cause she's a woman

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Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a brick at it.

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knock knock, whos there? billy i dont know who you are, please get away from my front door before i call the authorities

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Is it hungry in here? Or is it just me?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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