If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Roses are red, I'm tired... I think I'll lie down now

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Why a blonde woman eat vegetables? Because she is a vegetarian.

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A black person walks out of KFC

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Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

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A man tells the bartender," A bar walks into a man..." The bartender says," What the hell? I think you've had enough"

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Whats worse than not coming up with an original anti joke? Nothing.

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Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

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A man keeping specific track of time,eagerly waits for a punch line.

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Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? Bananas don't scream as much when you peel them.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a WAFFLE!

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What did the cannibal say after he ate the clown? I am not sure as the tragic situation occurred while the clown was hiking alone.

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Why did the black man have lots of money. He studied hard at school and got into a good university. He dedicated 5 years of his life working relentlessly and getting his diploma in medicine then went on to work in a private hospital as head doctor and neuro surgeon. He was very successful in his specific field of medicine. That didn't work out so after quitting his job and realizing he had wasted over 7 years of his life achieving nothing but lose of interest in his career. He then bought a lottery ticket and won 8 million dollars.

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Gun Control

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Knock Knock Whos there? It's me your mom you dumbass and let me in

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. I'm not sure, because there are many farmers on this earth, and finding the same one that you are talking about, may be hard. It may take a while, but i'll get back to you as soon as possible, with an anwser.

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knock knock who's there BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! who OPEN THE DOOR ITS THE POLICE

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why did the asain hate his life he didn't he was living a good life with large amounts of money with a very hot wife

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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