A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

Roses are black, violets are black, we are all black Shit i'm colour blind

?ti saw won troffe eht htrow t'nsaw yllaer siht

Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

What gas station can u make a Kwick trip at? Kwick trip

What's brown and sticky? Shit.

What the kid with no arms get for christmas? A baseball and a glove to go through with his dad

Why was the baby crying? He saw a black guy

I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

Violets are red. Roses are blue. I am drunk, and i'm about to spew.

why is Justin Berber gay? hes not thats rust a myth

Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

What do Texans call cows? Cows. Calling them almost anything else would be utterly illogical.

*prepares this to get negged*

Why did the fat kid drop his Mcdonalds? Because he had a stroke.

Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

Knock Knock I don't have a door. I'm Homeless

Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...