2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

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Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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69

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

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Why is your face? Because.

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

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A teenage girl walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic drink. The bartender declines the order as she is under the legal age of purchasing and consuming alcohol.

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knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

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Society.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

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Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

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whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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