Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

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I'm so hungry I could eat food

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

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What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Yo mamma so fat, she probably has Type Two Diabetes - which is often associated with obesity - and should seek medical advice.

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" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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