How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

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What do Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have in common? They are both blind.

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What is the difference between a rabbit and a plum? A: They are both purple, except for the rabbit!

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What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

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Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

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wanna hear a joke? yes

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How do you make an anti-joke? Like this....

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What do you call a gay man? Homosexual

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was simply tired of being mocked and judged by society.

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A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Why did my pussy get wet? Because I splashed him with water. LOL SO FUNNY OMFG DA BEST JOKE EVA!!

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

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What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

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Why is there no gambling in Africa? Because there's no money in Africa.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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69

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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A mermaid walks into a bar, but she has no legs, so she flops over and proceeds to drag herself into the bar.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Delivery for a Mr. Peerson? Oh yes, that's me. Thank you.

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i like my babies how i like my potatoes..... skinned

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What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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