What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

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what did the farmer say to the cowgirl that made her positive that she had a weird laugh? you have a weird laugh.

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What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

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whats hard, its not what you think a penis

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what happened to the black guy after he turned off the light? he probably wanted to save energy, so he moved to a different room with natural sunlight as a light resource.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

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A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

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What's worse than finding a bone in your boneless chicken meal? Going home to find your entire family brutally murdered.

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What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

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Mac: Hi, I'm a Mac! PC: And I'm a PC. Steve Jobs died.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy Get in the van

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A man walks in a barn. He lifts his bucket of food and starts feeding his horses.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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Daniel Textor can suck a gooch he's such a F - A - GGGGG!! Let's beat him up at lunch.

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What do you do when you fall of the horse? Consider calling the paramedics because it's possible that when you hit the ground your brain sustained damage and you should be rushed to a hospital immediately.

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Do you want to hear a good knock knock joke? Okay, you start.

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Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

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I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

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What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

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A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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