How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They use candles

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

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I made a sandwich Lol jk, my gf made it for me

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Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

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http://logs.omegle.com/de4e4b0

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Donald Trump

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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What happened to the black man when he was eating a Tootsie Roll? He ate the entire thing but was still hungry due to the empty calories.

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Why'd the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one.

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Q) 1+1=? A) 6.

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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Whats worse than not coming up with an original anti joke? Nothing.

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Samantha

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What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

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If u wanna get high, smoke weed

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whatts blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun, Get in the van.

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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What is black, white, and red all over? A person who has black, white, and red paint on his or her body.

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What makes a catholic priest happier then a visit to the penn state locker room? Introducing Jesus to people and them accepting him as their savior.

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knock knock come in

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What does Santa do on Halloween? He gives out candy to the kids who come to his door.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you get when you have sex with a $10 prostitute? Nothing, she's clean. She may be low-scale, but she'll be damned if she's not careful.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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