The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

An boy with ADHD walks into a

Why didn't the woman believe in God? Her own personal beliefs.

What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

what do you call a mixbreed of a bull dog and a shitzu? a sharpei

If shoes could talk they'd tell you that they are not willing support your weight & floors are extremely dirty.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

Q: What happened to the blonde who tried to commit suicide? A: She died.

What happened when the homosexual man came out of the closet? He was congratulated for winning the hide and seek contest.

what happens when a jew meets a black person answer: they greet one another

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has been sexually abusing 6 for all his life

Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

Usually, the bad (anti) jokes are the ones that don't make you laugh. Sometimes you laugh "with" the joke, other times, you laugh at the joke itself because it is a paragon for human failure. The jokes on this website are not exempt from that rigid stipulation. However, it should be noted that all the "jokes" on this particular website are actually hilarious because of the latter reason delineated in the above paragraph. Additionally, this joke was created by a machine and thus the originator of this work is by no means able to learn from the process of trial and error and therfore can make myriad unfunny jokes without compromise.

Q: how do you make a baby blow bubbles? A: hold it under water, or as an alternative you could hold it under its twin sisters blood.

Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

what happens when a Texan see's a black guy? he says howdy

Want to hear a cat joke? Just kitten.

Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

What does a human have in common with a tree?? You can cut a humans leg of and count the....oh wait

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Look at that bitches asss!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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