I cut my pubes, Now they itch a lot.

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why did the girl fall of the swing because she was pushed of by obama

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what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

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Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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how many gay men can you fit on a barstool 1

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Why did the baby cross the street. Because he was attached to the chicken.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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A man walked into the bar and ordered a drink, drank it then stood up and left remembering that he once had a drinking problem and had overcome it.

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

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A seal walks into a club.

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

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2

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What's worse than an empty bottle of Yoohoo? Literally nothing.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Whats funny? Nick Sotelo

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women's rights

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, we found your cat's body on the side of the road.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

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Why can't stars marry? Because they are masses of incandescent gas and thus have no feelings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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