Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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How did the happy clown die? Testicular Cancer.

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Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

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How do you make a baby eat his food? Make one first

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your mom is so stupid she did not do so well on her IQ test

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A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing? Answer - A gay homosexual

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

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Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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Steve Jobs.

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Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You tell em a AntiJoke!

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head.

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So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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