What has 14 eyes, 14 legs, 70 toes and 7 noses... 7 people.

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

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Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

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What is brown, smells like shit and on fire? A muslim after the bomb vest malfuctioned!

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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96

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What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

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two muffins are in an oven. 30 min. later i ate a delicious treat.

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i like my women how i like my coffee ....i dont like coffee

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What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

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Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

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Hey

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obama is a good president

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Your momma is so boss that I work for her.

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Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

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Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

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Q: how do you get a man with one arm out of a tree? A: shoot him

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What do Chuck Norris and Oprah Winfrey have in common? They are both white, male, good actors, white, rich, and white. Except for the eagle.

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The glass is half an hour.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops