Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? The question just posed is unanswerable, as in order to state the reasoning for the chicken crossing the road, one would have to assume the a chicken has a concept of 'road'. As the chicken is an avant, we can safely say that it has no need of pavements/ sidewalks or roads. As a result, it cannot possibly have an incentive for doing so. Consider the following hypothetical analogy: you are walking in a forest, and you unknowingly cross another animals scent trail. You cannot possibly say WHY you walked across the scent trail, as you didn't know it was there. You can state your reasoning for walking in the first place, but not for crossing that specific scent trail. In conclusion, this question is unanswerable, due to the chicken's lack of knowledge about roads.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A white horse walks into a bar and orders a bitter. The bartender says "Hey, do you know we've got a drink named after you?" The horse says; "Eeek! A talking cow."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops