Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what do you call 4 black people pushing a car uphill? unfortunate

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the person write an antijoke? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the little boy grow up to be a homosexual man? He didn't find the female reproductive system sexually appealing

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not quite sure, but I just realized that my new pair of boxer briefs has ripped along the seam. Oh, and earlier this morning, I stubbed my toe pretty bad. The nail is all purple and the toe is all swollen, it was bleeding profusely until I put three bandages over the wound. It's still throbbing with pain. Oh, and also, a few months ago, I lost my job. It wasn't because I was constantly late or anything, it was more because as a server, I had been required to lift trays and stand and walk for the entirety of my shift. The only problem is, that about a year ago, I was involved in a serious car accident (once again, an occurrence that had not been due to my own actions). This car accident severed my spine in the L5 region. I can now barely walk for long periods of time, I find it impossible to run, I can no longer play sports and enjoy being a 21 year old male. I am in constant pain and it affects my breathing, my legs, the rest of my back, and also my teeth (due to the neurological connections dealing with the spinal cord). I am now currently looking for a new job, a more suitable job, to help sustain my hectic lifestyle. No, it is not a lifestyle of parties and what not, it is merely the lifestyle of living under roof and owning a used car. I have an alcoholic mother and my childhood was devoid a father. I raised myself, and to this day, I still have no family to help me through my financial struggles. I need nearly 2000 dollars in less than a week in order to pay all my bills, have my car fixed, and eat for another month. The only problem is, I have a dollar and 58 cents to my name. I wish I was this chicken, crossing roads, and what not, not just to get to the other side, but to live a better life. But, one can only wish.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

69

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what happened at the end of the korean marley and me? dinner

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A guy walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Jesse's mom is so god damn fat that it is an extreme danger just being around her

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

thumb_up thumb_down -17

People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops