An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she's a woman

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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dylan wishes he could come up with funny jokes. but that is impossible for a man trying to bat with a .5inch ****

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What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

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What do you call a black man in church? Religious

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You're so sweet I have diabetes

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Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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If life gives you lemonade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops