Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

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girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWERWHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWERWHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER

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A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

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why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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guess what what ...

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What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

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How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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