Three guys went barhopping. One slipped and broke his dick.

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Whats worse than 911..? The plane ride there.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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A man walks into a bar. ouch.

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Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms..

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? No reply cause Kyle got knocked out by the door.

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hardy har har.. i should be working on a school project right now!!

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Q: What's worse than finding 1 worm in your apple? A: Finding 2 worms in your apple Q: What's worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? A: The Holocaust Q: What's worse than the Holocaust? A: Finding 3 worms in your apple!

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Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

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How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What's the difference between you and a cat? The cats mom isn't a whore.

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I AM SOFA KING WE TOD HEAD - AV

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How do u get a baby to stop choking? Take ur c*ck out if its mouth!!!

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are walking in the forest when they come across a set of tracks. The brunette says, "Those are dear tracks." The redhead says, "Those are elk tracks." The blonde says, "Those are moose tracks." They are then hit by bus.

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Your dad is so bald, that a various number of people compliment him on how well shaven his head is.

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What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Pirate math.

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What did the blonde say when she found a dead bird on the sidewalk? "Aww, look at the poor dead bird!"

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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George: I see you got a haircut. Jim: No, I got them all cut.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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I have a joke. Okay, tell me. Just kidding

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What's big and fat? An obese man.

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Little Justin's bike has a flat tire has a flat tire. He asks his dad to inflate it. "Sure Justin I can fix that for you." Said his father. But he overinflates the tire, causing the tire to explode and ignite the chemicals. The house burns to the ground, killing Justin and his parents. The fire then spreads and the hole city burns. 50,000 people die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops