Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

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A black guy gets a job...

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a hobo begs and begs for a dollar to buy something. a man finally gives him a dollar. what does the hobo buy? nothing. he walked into 711 and got shot.

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What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

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I had sex with my mother in law

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"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

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A chronic hemophiliac walks into a bar. He cuts his leg and bleeds to death.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, your entire family has died in a terrible car accident.

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What is white and stands in the corner? A refridgerator who has been very bad...

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A brown haired woman walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor it hurts whenever I touch myself." The doctor says, "Strange, I have never heard of such a disease. Please show me." The woman touches her leg and screams,"Ow!" Then she touches her arm and screams again. The doctor asks, "Are you a natural brunette?" The woman replies, "No, I am a blonde." The doctor says, "Oh, that explains it. You have a broken finger. God, you are so blonde." The woman gets her finger treated and then lives in agony for the rest of her life due to her untreated broken leg and arm.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Im going to the patriots jets game this year..... When the kick a feild goal and you see two kids wearing lime green holding up a poster that says BRADY LIKES SAGGY BALLS that will be me and my friend -RT

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have you seen the movie, Constipated? Never mind, it hasn't come out yet.

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Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?? Theres one less drunk.

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

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R.I.P. Steve Jobs

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What was even more disgusting than the holocaust? Lucy's new shoes.

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Strawberries!

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Woof woof

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What is yellow, smooth, and dangerous? Shark-infested custard

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Two Poles are walking down the street. One says "Look out, I think that's dog shit." The other man thanks him and avoids the excrement.

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Roses are red, viotels are blue. God made me pretty, what happened to you?

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A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

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Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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