What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Give her a time-out. Throwing sharp objects is not okay.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Obama is a good president, I beg to differ.

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You know what is not cool? Fire.

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What did suzie do when she dropped her cookie? She died because it was secretly a bomb

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter it's not going to come to you anyway.

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Iggy Azalea

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Well educated black man.

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What do you call a qoman with 10 kids? A mother with 10 kids

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Roses are red Violets are blue Who is your daddy And what does he do?

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Dyslexic devil worshippers sell their souls to Santa

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A dinosaur walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender goes home and tells his wife what he saw. His wife leaves him.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of problems with money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Congress back then: No sooner had I ended this prayer than a pederast farted on my right. "Hah! a good omen," said I, and prostrated myself; then I burst open the door by a vigorous push with my arse, and, opening my mouth to the utmost, shouted, "Senators, I wanted you to be the first to hear the good news; since the war broke out, I have never seen anchovies at a lower price!"

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A black man rode down the street on a bicycle.

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Just finished taking a huge $hit, wiped my ass, then realized I wasn't done.

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Did you hear about the guy who got his entire LEFT side ripped off? He's dead.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. These are facts. Good day.

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Why was the guy sad? His son killed himself after being constantly bullied for 6 years.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? F*ck

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Hello, nice to meet you.

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Knock knock Who's there? Your friend Jim Oh hello Jim, please come in it is very nice to see you this fine evening.

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i dont like attention whores lol

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a man i knew who was a real jerk was about to drive home drunk. i was trying to stop him, but then he punched me in the face. i let him through. he died that night. i texted him all the way

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How do you know if your friend is dead? You shoot him in the face!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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