It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

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What is green and has weels? A green bycicle.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will have her institutionalized as soon as they find her.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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Why was little billy sad? He had a crouton stuck up his asshole.

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What is quite heavy and if it falls off a tree and hits you in your head you die? A sheets packet

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Two bananas are walking down the street. One says, "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" The other banana says, "Wait a minute, fruit can't talk." The second banana turns into a dove and promptly flies away.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

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Woman's Rights

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What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

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FUCK YOU NEVEN

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Why is jim gay? because he likes men

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Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He loved working with tourists.

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Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

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"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

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What did the doctor say to the camel with no hump? You're a horse.

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what's the difference between a male and female skeleton? The jaw bone structure

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Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

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What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

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why did summer hit the child because the child is jackson

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A black man, a jew, and an atheist are on a boat. Suddenly the boat started sinking. A mermaid would only save two of them. who do did she save? Mermaids don't exist. The all died. They were my friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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