Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

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THEY SAY SEEING IS BELIEVING. I NEVER SAW 9/11! 9/11? NEVER HAPPENED -Jonathan

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What does it smell like, what does it feel like, do you like it? Yes

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Why could the boy not stop shaking? He has Parkinsons Syndrome.

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How do you know if a Frenchman has been in your house? You could ask a neighbor, or check to see if anything has been missing, or set up a camera. There are actually many ways.

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Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

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A zombie walks into a bar. It was shot by an M16 automatic rifle. The video game had zombies.

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Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

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What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man running the stand "Quack"! because he's a duck... and that's what ducks do.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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69

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

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Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

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What's 4+7 47

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Where did Sally go during the explosion? Everywhere.

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Its a bird...its a plane....it IS a plane

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

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Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

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A man walks into a pet store. He then says "This isn't the bar" and leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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