What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

1:Nice comeback. 2: If I wanted my cum back, I would get it off your mom's face

Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

Hi.

yfygcugyuyc

When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

Your mother is so old that she is dead.

Knock Knock Who's There Santa Santa Who? I stole your dog.

What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting your nipple ripped off by a pair of pliers

Q: What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? A: Drowning.

When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

A Chinese man walked into a bar. He now has a minor concussion.

Haikus are awesome but sometimes they don't make sense hippopotamus

What does ms colot like to eat? Pants

Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

What's bigger then a bowling ball? What? Your mom!

An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

women outside of the kitchen

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw a fridge at it

wnba

What's the difference between red hair and black hair? Redheads vs. blackheads

What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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