Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can not talk, therefore we can never find out from the chicken, who is the only thing that knows why it crossed the road. Scientists have study chickens and say that it most likely saw something edible, like a bug or some grain and walked over to eat it.

What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

What's worse than having a bad hair day? Vietnam.

roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar and decide to have a drinking contest. Who won? The rabbi. The priest died of alcohol poisoning later that night.

Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

What did the stuffed animal say to the human after the human said hi? Nothing, after all stuffed animals can't talk

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

a man walks into a bar he is promtly escorted out due to the fact that he wanted to kill the bars owner. The man got life in prison with no chance of parole. This mans name was Michael Myers.

What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

What's worse than finding Michael V. in your class? Finding Curtis W. in there instead\

Why do black guys have brown skin ? Because there born that way

Three people are stranded on an island. They are captured by a tribe of cannibal natives. The natives say " find 10 fruits of the same kind and bring them back" The first guy comes back with apples The natives say " shove them up your buttox without showing any sign of emotion" The firs guy gets to the second apple and then woos in pain the natives kill him The second guy comes back with blue berries he gets to the ninth berry and laughs. The natives kill him. The two guys are in heaven. The fist guy says " you could've survived why did you laugh?" the second guy replies," I saw the third guy coming back with pineapples"

There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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