What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

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democracy

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How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

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What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Japan called... They need help.

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Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

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If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

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two guys are waiting at a train station...6 hours later one guy turns to the other and says "train aint coming"

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There are two types of people in this world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter what you call him. He won't come.

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How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

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Miranda Lorenz is a WHORE!!! She has slept with three guys while in a relationship!! then when he broke up with her for cheating on him, she keyed his car!! Psycho Bitch!!!

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How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

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Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down.

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Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

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You are driving a bus. At the first stop, 12 people get on and 7 get off At the second stop, 13 people get on and 11 get off At the third stop, 7 people get off the bus. You turn the bus off get out and go home.

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A boy walks into a haunted cematery. Zombies eat him.

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Bin Laden comes out of a cave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops