John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who took a shit in my garden?

There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

Why did the boys uncle stop calling him? His uncle died of cancer 3 months ago.

what did the police do when they saw an arab running towards a building? Watched him run by because he was probably late for something

Whats worse than 10 dead babies In a tub 10 and 1/2

What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

some of these so called "anti-jokes" are real joke s- they don't belong on anti-joke. they are very funny but are traditional jokes that use cliched non-sequitor as punchlines.

Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mothers funeral.

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

It's only racist if you consider them people.

What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

whats green and has wings ? a flying patch of astro turf

Your mama is so stupid that she thought Brendan Fraser was a good actor.

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son of a B**ch.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing!!

Have you heard about the Polish kamikaze pilot? No, you haven't, because it would be historically and culturally incorrect.

A guy walks in to a bar and says "ow"

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died! Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey!!

what did the mom with cancer get for christmas? radiation poisoning

why couldn't the the black man get a job? because he doesn't posses the correct work ethic.

a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

What's the difference between a muffin and a scone? One's a muffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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