What's a worse feeling than an upset stomach? Seeing a child getting molested and not saying anything.

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What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

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This is not a joke.

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What did the orphan get for christmas? Glaucoma.

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roses are red, violets are blue, apparently you are blind or else I wouldn't be telling this to you.

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A Priest, Rabbi, and a Minister walk into a bar... i forgot the rest of the joke, but your mothers a whore!

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Whats worse than a bullet in the head? i have no idea, i have never been shot in the head so i'm not sure what to compare it to.

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A caar pllus itno a graege. You are probably dyslexic.

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you...

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what did the farmer say when he lost his red tractor?

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

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Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

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Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

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What did one cat say to the other cat? Meow. What did one dog say to the other dog? Meow. Why was the man sad? He had a retarded dog.

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"knock knock" "Come in"

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why did the little boy die? He had AIDS

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Why didn't the chef serve the black guy his food? Because he wasn't a waitor.

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Q. If Kim Kardashian and Kanye West were both drowning, what kind would you make? A. PBJ

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If there are 2 narwhals and two apples, why is each of the narwhals happy? Because each is a narwhal.

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Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

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YOUR MOTHER IS SO FAT that she sought a relevant support group. My understanding is that she tried Overeater's Anonymous and lost a few pounds, but it meant more that it improved her sense of self-worth. She's more comfortable with herself as a somewhat overweight woman, and a much happier person now. We're all very proud of her.

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A black man and a white woman cross paths while walking on the sidewalk. After greeting each other, they continue on their way. Each goes on to enjoy their respective day free of racism and sexism.

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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