Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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Knock knock Who there? A mute Bullshit

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At the time my grandfather came round to visit, what was happening in Australia? A giant spider was giving birth.

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what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

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Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

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Adam Thomas is homosexual

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Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

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why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

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What do you call an old man who took too much viagra? And ambulance, because he could possibly get a heart attack from the fluctuations in blood pressure

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Mr Jones, we're sending you to a mental health clinic

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Why did the chicken protest? He wanted to be able to cross the street without getting his motives questioned.

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Why do people on here submit anti-jokes involving children getting raped or killed? Because the people on this website are sadists. =/

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Where did Ann go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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whats one plus one penis

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Why did the pervert cross the road? His dick was stuck in the chicken

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What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

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Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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MAGHBERRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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